Are relationships work?

It’s something I hear every day: “Relationships take work.” “Being in one relationship is hard work; being in more than one relationship is even more work.” “Polyamory takes work.”

I have been thinking a fair bit about relationship work these days, particularly since the stress of doing this crowdfunding campaign and working on the book has been taking me away from several of my partners, who would like more time with me. (Who knew that trying to change the world would take this much time?)

We are live!

Woohoo! Our Indiegogo crowdfunding campaign for More Than Two is now live!

We have both been neglecting our entire lives for the last week while we’ve geared up to launch this crowdfunding campaign. (Seriously, who knew it would be so much work? Whew!) We’ve been shooting movies, writing copy, peering at spreadsheets, putting crowdfunding incentives together…and we’ve made some interesting packages. Want Badass McProblemsolver to solve your poly-related problem in a video? Want a custom-designed programmable sex toy? There’s all that and more available!

Compassion in tough times

A conversation recently came up amongst a group of poly folks I know: what happens when a couple starts traveling down the road to polyamory, and then problems come up?

At first, I didn’t really understand the question. After all, what do we do when problems come up in any aspect of our lives? We deal with them. We attempt to solve them, the best way we know how. And, somehow, we muddle through. After all, that’s life, right?

Polyamory: Moving toward and moving away

I was recently asked to do a media interview about polyamory. This happens from time to time, and most of the questions I’m asked tend to be fairly predictable: How do you deal with jealousy? What do you tell your parents or your kids? Do you think polyamory is the next cultural revolution?

This interview was quite different, and one of the questions I was asked helped crystallize for me some of the guiding ideals about the relationships I choose.

A tale of two logos

These are two logos we’ve considered for the book cover for More Than Two.

When I first started thinking about writing a book about polyamory, I wanted a book cover that expressed the way I feel about relationships: the importance of deliberate, conscious choice; the value of careful planning. The design I came up with, the one on the left, used the metaphor of a construction blueprint.

Welcome to the More Than Two book blog!

I started exploring polyamory back before the word “polyamory” started circulating. I’ve never been monogamous, and I’ve never had a monogamous relationship. When I started exploring romantic relationships myself, it was hard to find other people who felt the same way I did about love and romance. It was hard even to find the language to describe the things I wanted. “Open relationship” was about the closest I could come, but it didn’t really do much to talk about how I wanted my life to look.