Franklin and I have just wrapped up a very well-attended session on abuse in polyamorous relationships at the Poly Living 2015 conference in Philadelphia, which was a follow-up to Franklin’s keynote last night on “Telling Our Stories, Changing the World.” We’re very grateful that so many people came to the session, especially the numerous mental health professionals who contributed their expertise to the discussion. We wanted to make the resources mentioned at the session available here for easy access.
- We’ve uploaded our slides from the presentation to SlideShare
- We’ve made the entire Relationship Bill of Rights available on this website.
- Love Is Respect is an educational and resource site about abuse. It includes pages for survivors and perpetrators of abuse, as well as information on helping friends or family members who are experiencing (or committing) abuse.
- Abuse in Polyamorous Relationships: a powerful essay by a survivor of an abusive poly relationship.
- The author of that essay also keeps a blog.
- Poly Weekly episode on emotional abuse.
- The Northwest Network of Bisexual, Trans, Lesbian & Gay Survivors of Abuse has expertise in dealing with abuse in small, relatively closed communities.
- The Network/La Red is a survivor-led organization for ending partner abuse.
- And here’s a good resource guide for men in abusive relationships.
- NEW 11/7/2016: Here’s a long, comprehensive essay on confronting abuse in polyamorous relationships, including detailed and useful discussions on tricky issues like metamour abuse and when an abuser is claiming to be a victim.
Here are some books:
- Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft. (Powells | Indiebound | Amazon)
- Controlling People: How to Recognize, Understand, and Deal with People Who Try to Control You by Patricia Evans. (Powells | Indiebound | Amazon)
- Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You by Susan Forward. (Powells | Indiebound | Amazon)
- Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults, and Beliefs by Stevan Hassan. (Powells | Indiebound | Amazon)
If you need immediate help, or just need to talk to someone, you can call the National Abuse Hotline at (800) 799-7233.